A Love Letter - "Su bebé"

I woke up in the dead of the night with a poem in my heart for you. Here it goes:


Venir aqui el amor. Leave the cold room and lay in my warm sheets.


Venir aqui el amor, face me and lay across my lap. Let me hold you like a Spanish guitar.


Let me glide my fingers effortlessly from the top of your neck to the bottom of your spine.The ridges like frets, my fingering changing as they walk the mile of your back.


Come and let us sing in breaths and moans as my lower arm rests on the dip of your hips while I strum your back and kiss your lips.


Let's make beautiful music in the night while the lonely moon peeps through the window, envious of us.


Ven aquí y déjame que te amo.


Su bebé


Venir aqui el amor (come here my love) y déjame que te amo (and let me love you)
Su bebé (Your baby)

Love Letter - The Early Days

Like a thief tiptoeing around me, the minutes grew into hours without notice. I sat endlessly without tiring, no grasp of time as I thought of the what, why, and how of "you".


I find you complexly delicious and out of reach of words. A testament to my inability to string the right words together. Aargh... words.They are so limited and limiting when it comes to "you".


I pause shortly and then start laughing at myself realizing that all I truly have is many words to express that I have no words.


Goodnight.

Fear and Faith

I see you best when my eyes are closed.

Pastel Painting by: Bianca Bueno

The fear of the future is the fear of the unknown. We resort to logic to battle the fear. We try to “know”. But even with our best logic, it’s impossible to really “know”. The sooner we make peace with that, the sooner we can live. The sooner we can experience life as "ourselves".

In the context of pursuing a new relationship, we sometimes fear the future so we can protect ourselves from it if need be. But even with our best calculation we still end-up with a guess. When I feel like I’m falling for somebody, it’s human for me to want to know my future is with the person I've chosen and I also want a guarantee I won’t get hurt. Life doesn’t work that way.

In love as in most things in life, to move forward you need to take the risk and LEAP! With each new potential partner, we come to a point where we stand on the edge and stare into a free fall. That can be scary. I’ve had my share of heartbreak and it has gotten progressively harder to just “jump off a cliff and build wings on the way down”. This time I might just go splat! but old scars remind me of a few things I’ve learned the hard way.

There is no point fearing the future because nobody is assured of it, in relationships especially.We should be more fearful of not being able to “live” in the present because today determines the tomorrow. Today is all we truly have.

When do you know when to take the risk? Trust your instincts. If it doesn’t feel right it usually isn’t. Your heart has a way of telling you what’s right that your brain can’t comprehend.


“Leap and the net will appear”. I have chosen to not let fear get the best of me. I realized that if I live in fear, I cannot live in the present. If I cannot live in the present, I cannot have a future with the person I’ve chosen. Living in the present with the person I’ve chosen means I need to take that leap of faith. The question now becomes “is that person is ready to take that leap of faith with me...”

Do Not

Do not kiss me but if you were to kiss me, 
Then do so in crisp articulateness, with suave maneuvers of clean cultured patterns, with artful taste and the exact statement of intent. Kiss me to let me know you just want the thrill of my lips and nothing more.




Do not touch me! But if you must, if you are indeed going to then TOUCH me… not shyly, lightly, half-there nor in whispers but completely, in screams, boldly and deeply.
TOUCH ME then after never let me go.